


Christmas Party

by through_shadows_falling



Series: Supernatural Ficlets [54]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Office, Christmas Fluff, Christmas Party, F/M, First Kiss, M/M, Secret Santa, Supernatural style, The Office parody
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-24
Updated: 2015-12-24
Packaged: 2018-05-08 19:59:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5511056
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/through_shadows_falling/pseuds/through_shadows_falling
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“And here’s Mr. Fizzles for the announcement!” came a high-pitched, childish voice that sounded suspiciously like his boss, Garth. </p><p>Dean sighed, then stared directly into the camera. </p><p>Seriously? How was this his life?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Christmas Party

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SarahJaneS](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SarahJaneS/gifts).



> Based on the prompt: "A parody of The Office with SPN characters and Dean and Cas as Jim and Pam. But who would be Dwight..."
> 
> I've watched all of The Office (American version) and recently re-watched its first Christmas episode ("Christmas Party" - the tenth episode of season 2) for inspiration for this fic, since the show's been off-air for a while. Also took a few bits from the last episode *sniff*
> 
> Also also, Jim/Pam = OTP.
> 
> Bonus points if you can figure out who all the characters are in relation to their Office counterparts!

“Conference room in ten minutes!” Garth announced as he poked his head out of his office.

Dean mentally groaned. As nice as it was to break up the monotony of spreadsheet after spreadsheet, Garth’s meetings were, frankly, ludicrous. How the man had secured a management position Dean had no idea, but suggesting the guy was ‘weird’ didn’t come even close.

A snort sounded from his right, and he glanced over to the reception desk where Castiel met his eyes. They grinned at each other, as they both knew from experience that as stupid as Garth’s meeting promised to be, at least it’d keep them entertained. They could always count on him for that.

“Excited for the meeting, Sam?” Dean asked. 

But his desk mate, a tall man by the name of Sam Wesson, didn’t acknowledge him. 

Ah. He must still be pissed about the prank this morning. Dean chuckled just thinking about it. 

Sam had an unhealthy obsession with…healthy food. The guy prattled non-stop about the organic food he grew in his personal greenhouse, and loved to discuss how the thermodynamics worked in the winter. Then there were his endless conversations (or boring monologues, as Dean never contributed more than an eye-roll) about kale and other such rabbit food. Sam was a walking encyclopedia on how to be a high-grade food snob, and as someone who enjoyed hamburgers, beer, and you know,  _ life _ , Dean figured Sam could use some loosening up from his rigid routines. 

So he helped add a little flavor to Sam’s day. A little… _ spice _ , so to speak. 

This morning, Dean had inserted wasabi into Sam’s carefully crafted guacamole. 

Sam had been chatting up his perfect guacamole all week. He’d made it with fresh avocados after determining their “peak ripeness” in a series of ridiculous tests that Dean couldn’t imagine himself performing, let alone witnessing. Sam had also mixed in his “unique blend of spices” and mentioned how it was a “nutrient booster” or some crap, but Dean had already been concocting a plan. 

And this morning, he’d executed it to perfection. With Castiel’s help, of course, who kept Sam distracted by asking what was so special about heirloom vegetables. 

The result at lunch time was priceless.

Dean had worked in the wasabi so it blended perfectly, and there was definitely enough to enliven the guy’s taste buds. As he and Castiel sauntered into the break room, Sam was in the middle of enlightening Bobby about his guacamole yet again. Bobby, for his part, didn’t even look like he was listening, as he was engrossed in his usual book of crosswords. But that didn’t deter Sam, who kept right on talking until he finally grabbed an organic, gluten-free, low-sodium, all-natural corn chip, scooped up some guacamole, and deposited it in his mouth. He noticed Dean and his expression turned smug until the wasabi kicked in. Then, his eyes bugged out of his head, and Castiel nearly burst a blood vessel he was laughing so hard. 

So yeah, now Sam wasn’t talking to him. He often gave Dean the cold shoulder after his little “stunts,” and he’d already lodged a complaint with human resources. Their HR rep, Marv, didn’t care though, as he said he was bored of their antics. 

“Come on, Sam,” Dean said, “I know you made several batches. There’s more perfect guacamole waiting for you at home.”

“I don’t think you realize just how long it took him to prepare it,” Ruby said, as she planted herself behind Sam. She was in accounting, and sat with Ash and Charlie over in their little nerd corner as Dean liked to call it, since they were all math geeks. Ruby had sauntered all the way over here, though, because rumor had it she was sleeping with Sam and therefore had to defend her man. 

“Butt out of this, Ruby,” Dean said. “You weren’t timing him as he made it. Unless…you were there, watching him? Because maybe you’d spent the night?” Dean waggled his eyebrows. 

Ruby crossed her arms over her chest, but said nothing as she stomped to the conference room. 

Oh, right, Garth’s meeting. 

Dean stood and waited for Castiel to join him before they both stepped into the conference room after their other co-workers. They took their places in chairs along the wall, and Dean groaned at the sight of an overturned box in the front of the room. That could only mean…

“And here’s Mr. Fizzles for the announcement!” came a high-pitched, childish voice that sounded suspiciously like his boss. A sock puppet sprang up behind the box, and Dean sighed. 

Then he stared directly into the camera. 

Although Dean often forgot the crew wasn’t there, he and his co-workers were actually being filmed 100% of the time while at work. Some bozo had decided to film a documentary of life at Roman Enterprises, which Dean found ridiculous. At least it wasn’t completely boring, though. With characters like Sam and Garth, plus Dean (who liked to think his pranks kept things exciting) it was probably more of a parody than anything.

Mr. Fizzles was just icing on the cake.

“The Roman Enterprises Holiday Party is coming up soon,” the puppet said, its mouth moving in time with its words. “So we’d like to organize a Party Planning Committee to put it all together. Would anyone like to volunteer?”

Dean elbowed Castiel. “Yeah right,” he muttered.

“And there’s our first volunteer! Everyone clap for Dean!” 

Dean stared at Mr. Fizzles as there was a smattering of applause and curious looks in his direction. “Uh. What? I didn’t—”

“You were saying  _ something _ over there, so what was Mr. Fizzles supposed to think?”

Dean winced. He opened his mouth to protest, but snapped it closed when Castiel shot him a smirk. 

“Have fun,” Castiel mouthed. 

Dean subtly flipped him off. Or at least he thought it was subtle until Sam pointed at him.

“Mr. Fizzles, I do believe Dean is exhibiting mean-spirited behavior toward Castiel.”

Freaking tattle-tale. 

“Dean, you know how Mr. Fizzles feels about mean-spirited behavior,” the puppet said, its beady little eyes on Dean.

He sighed. “Yes, Mr. Fizzles. I apologize for my rudeness, Cas.”

“I humbly accept your apology, Dean,” Castiel said, though his eyes glinted with humor. 

Dean glared at him. He caught Sam and Ruby trading self-satisfied looks and slumped into his seat. They’d only just started the meeting and already he found himself contemplating if he’d survive a fall from three stories up. 

Mr. Fizzles managed to elicit several volunteers for the Party Planning Committee in addition to Dean. Dean thanked god Charlie raised her hand, and was amused when Ellen put in for it. Then Ruby had to go and ruin everything, plus Meg and Becky.

“We should get some other men involved,” Becky said, her voice full of way too much pep for the middle of the afternoon on a weekday. She looped her arm through Chuck’s beside her. “I think Chuck should join, too.”

Chuck grimaced. “I, uh…”

“A fantastic idea!” Mr. Fizzles said, and his voice broke a new octave that had Dean wanting to stab out his eardrums. “Then it’s all settled—”

“Wait, I’ll join, too,” Castiel said, and Dean gave him a surprised look. “You know, to add more of a male perspective.”

Garth finally stood up from behind the box. He wiped his hands on his pants. “Great! So the rest of us should get back to work while we let the Party Planning Committee get started.”

“Wait, we’re doing this now?” Dean asked. 

Garth smiled at him. “Sure are! And remember that nothing’s off limits!” He paused. “Except booze. Company policy, right, Marv?”

Marv shrugged. “Sure. Whatever.”

“Oh come on,” Meg said. “No booze? Then how do you expect us to have fun?”

“I’m positive you’ll think of something,” Garth said. He skipped out of the conference room and back to his office. Everyone but the newly selected Party Planning Committee shuffled out after him. 

Dean helped the others set up a table and chairs while Charlie stepped out to grab a pen and notepad. 

They sat, and Ellen was the first to speak. “What about a rustic Christmas?”

“Sam can chop down a tree,” Ruby said. 

“I bet he can do a lot of things,” Dean said, and Ruby gave him a look.

“So the rustic Christmas idea,” Ellen cut in. “Does anyone like that idea?” She glanced around.

“Sounds fine?” Chuck said with a shrug.

“I love it,” Becky said, clapping her hands. “Come on, Chuck, you love it, too. It’ll be all cozy. We can have plaid tablecloths and wooden coasters and candles!”

“I like that,” Castiel agreed with a nod. “But candles are a fire hazard, so maybe we can get some fake ones instead.”

Charlie scribbled down their ideas. “Yeah, the cute battery-powered ones are fine. What an awesome idea, Ellen! We can definitely make this work.”

“But no booze?” Meg said. She leaned back to prop her feet up on the table. “Seriously, this won’t be a good party without booze.”

“I’m with you there,” Dean said, and Castiel elbowed him. 

“We can still have delicious,  _ non-alcoholic _ drinks,” he said.

“Like eggnog!” Becky said. “I’ve got a killer recipe at home. Remember, Chuck? I had you try it last year?” 

Chuck groaned and managed a weak smile. “I remember. There was...a lot of it.”

“But it was delicious, right?” Becky said. “ _ Right? _ ” She whacked him on the arm and he flinched.

“Oh. Yes, definitely. Good stuff.”

“Eggnog it is,” Charlie said. “And Ruby, you said Sam can bring in a tree?”

“Yep,” Ruby said, smirking. 

“I didn’t know you were into lumberjacks,” Dean said.

“I didn’t know you were into male receptionists,” she shot back.  

Dean’s face flamed. He glanced quickly at Castiel, but he’d lucked out, since the other man was deep in a side conversation with Ellen. Dean let out a relieved sigh.

The meeting continued for another half hour while they discussed decorations, food, drinks, and games. Dean couldn’t care less about most of it, though he did agree to bring in his famous pizza rolls. 

“I’m excited to sample your cooking again,” Castiel said as they wrapped up and everyone returned to their desks. He and Castiel had lingered behind, and now they had the conference room to themselves. 

Dean smiled, pleased. “So  _ that’s _ why you volunteered to join the committee. I knew there had to be a reason.”

“Well, yes, I wouldn’t want anyone to be deprived of your cooking, so that was part of it. Also, I think I enjoy event planning.”

Dean blushed. “Oh. Right, yeah, you helped your sister with her wedding last summer.”

“Yes. It was more fun than I thought it would be. In any case, I’m looking forward to this year’s party.”

“Me too, I guess. I mean, pretty much anything can top last year’s.”

Last year, Sam had gotten involved in the planning, and all they’d eaten was salad, vegetable wraps, and organic “fizzy drinks.” At least now they’d have edible foods to eat.

“Too bad on the no-booze policy though,” Castiel said. “I know some great lagers that’d go well with the theme.”

“Maybe you should sneak some in then,” Dean said with a grin. 

“Perhaps I should.”

They stared at each other just a little too long before Dean heaved a breath. “Well, I’ve got a sales call coming up, so I better go get ready for it. I’ll, uh, see ya, Cas.”

“Of course, Dean. We work in plain sight of each other.”

Dean shoved him and, laughing, they walked back to their stations.

 

****

 

The time leading up to the Holiday Party whipped by, and before Dean knew it, he was hanging wreaths and strands of fake pine needle garland around the office in preparation for the big event. When he came to Crowley’s desk, he found that the man had already decorated. 

“Are those...skulls?” Dean asked. 

“I made them myself,” Crowley said, a hint of pride in his voice. 

Dean attempted a smile as he eyed the tiny skulls that had been strung up like Christmas lights across his cubicle wall. “What’re those, rats?”

“Some of them were,” Crowley said, and he left it at that. Dean shuddered and hurriedly moved away. The dude was downright creepy.

“When’s the food going to be ready?” Ash asked when Dean passed by the accounting corner. “I could literally eat a horse right now.”

“We’re still setting up,” Dean said. “But it’s gonna be awesome, so don’t worry.”

A commotion near the receptionist desk drew everyone’s attention, and Dean sighed in relief when Sam bustled in hauling a huge Christmas tree. 

“About time you showed up. We’re almost all ready,” Dean said as he trotted over to help. “Dude, this thing’s way too tall. I know you’ve got a messed up sense of size, but seriously.”

“It’ll fit, okay?”

“That’s what she said!” Garth added as he popped out of his office. “Wow, Sam, you got a big one!”

Dean stared at the camera. Really? What was his life?

Together, the three of them hefted the Christmas tree over to its designated corner. When they righted it, the top burst through the ceiling tile. 

“Oopsie-doopsie,” Garth said. 

“Should we cut the top off?” Dean asked.

“Nah,” Garth said, waving his hand dismissively. “The plaster’s like fake snow. Looks more realistic!”

Dean gazed down at the bits of white flecking the carpet, then stared at the camera again. Of course Garth would put a positive spin on destroying company property. Of course.

Dean shrugged and got back to work.

The party turned out to be a success. The theme made everything feel comfortable and cozy, and even though there was no alcohol allowed, the sheer amount of food Dean ate caused his mind to go pleasantly fuzzy. He found himself thoroughly enjoying everything, especially the way Castiel looked. 

Castiel had decided to dress like an elf, since he was running the Yankee Swap. His costume was ridiculous, with candy-cane striped leggings, a jingly green skirt and red tunic, a long, drooping hat, and even elf ears. He also wore curved slippers on his feet with bells attached to the front that tinkled with every step.

Dean couldn’t stop grinning at the sight of him, and he made Castiel grab presents for him that were behind the Christmas tree, just to make him jingle while he walked the extra distance.

“I know what you’re doing,” Castiel whispered to him as he passed Dean a new gift, since his bottle of red wine had been stolen from a gruff Bobby who insisted it was for his wife. 

“Sure you do,” Dean said, and he set about unwrapping his present. When he’d torn off the paper, he held it up in shock to his co-workers, who were seated in a circle around the tree.

“A poop pillow?” Dean said. It was a pillow in the shape of the smiling poop emoji, wrapped in plastic.

The room burst into laughter, Castiel most of all, and Dean shook his head at him.

“I hate you,” he said fondly. 

“I was hoping you’d pick that one,” Castiel returned with a wink.

“You suck.”

“I hope you enjoy your poop pillow!”

“Yeah, sure. No one wants to steal this? It’s pretty soft, actually,” Dean said enticingly, holding it up. But he was out of luck. No one wanted the pillow, so when the Yankee Swap ended, Dean was stuck with it.  

“You’re the worst,” Dean said, as Castiel sat next to him with his own gift. Castiel had picked a cutting board and knife set. 

“I’m actually the best,” Castiel said. “It’s a thoughtful gift. You can use it for your back, since your chair is awful.”

Dean raised an eyebrow. “Oh yeah, you definitely thought about the poop pillow’s  _ usefulness  _ when you bought it.”

Castiel laughed. “Hey, I’m just suggesting one way you can use it. But it’s completely up to you what you do with it, as the poop pillow’s owner.”

“Owner? So what, it’s a dog now?”

The party continued for another hour after that. Meg turned on some club music and started dancing with Crowley encouraging her from the sidelines. Becky sat on Chuck’s lap while he scowled through another cup of eggnog. Sam and Ruby were mysteriously missing (gross), and Garth was happily chatting with Ellen and Bobby. In the corner, Charlie and Ash had retreated to play cards, while Marv was reading a book.

“Not a bad party, if I say so myself,” Dean said as he surveyed the crowd again.

“I would have to agree,” Castiel said. “I had a lot of fun.”

“Me, too.”

They smiled at each other until Castiel cleared his throat and stood. “I just remembered that I forgot something in my car. Will you come with me to get it?”

Dean rose to his feet. “Yeah, sure. Lead the way, elf-man.”

Castiel smirked and headed out. Dean trailed behind him as they walked down the stairs, through the lobby, and into the parking lot. 

“Oh wow, it snowed,” Dean said as his steps crunched on the ground. There was only a thin layer, but big, fat flakes were still falling from the sky. He looked up and one landed in his eye. “Ow, son of a bitch.”

“Did the snowflake bite you?” Castiel asked as he stopped at his car and popped the trunk.

Dean rubbed his eye. “No. It just melted and freaked me out. Got me in the eye.” He squinted through his good eye. “You still driving that hunka junk?” He indicated Castiel’s appalling 1978 Lincoln Continental.

“Yes, Dean. Now,” Castiel trailed off as he turned to Dean. In the dim lighting of the parking lot, he appeared almost...nervous. Or maybe he was just cold, since they’d both forgotten their jackets and were now getting covered with snow.

Still, Dean smiled. “What’s up, Cas? Or are we going to stand out here all night?”

A snowflake pirouetted down onto Castiel’s nose, where it instantly melted. More snow caught in his hair and eyelashes.“I got you something,” he said finally. He dug back in his trunk, which was shadowed from where Dean stood. “It’s probably too cheesy, but I thought… Just tell me if it’s not okay, alright? And we can just pretend it never happened.”

“Uh, Cas?” Dean said. He shifted his weight from side to side to stay warm as he shoved his hands in his armpits. “You’re kinda freaking me out here.”

“Sorry. I just…” Castiel retrieved whatever he came for and then shoved it at Dean.

Dean removed his hands to accept a sprig of a plant. But not just any plant.

“Is this...mistletoe?”

Castiel ducked his head. “Yes. And I realize this is horribly lame but the idea struck and wouldn’t go away.”

“Okay. Why did you just give me mistletoe? Are we going to hang it somewhere?”

“No. I’m giving it to you because I want to kiss you.”

All the air whooshed from Dean’s lungs. 

“I’m interested in being with you, Dean, as more than friends,” Castiel continued. “This is my poor effort at asking you out.” He jammed his hands into his pockets, and Dean was struck by the image of a sad, lonely elf out in the snow, all alone. He almost laughed out loud, but stopped when Castiel hugged himself and bit his lip.

This was  _ Cas _ . Dean’s best friend of several years, his co-conspirator, his party planning expert and co-worker extraordinaire. They’d been through a lot together, and Dean couldn’t deny that he’d considered this future: Cas as a boyfriend, rather than just the guy he flirted with across the office. 

After all, Ruby’s teasing hadn’t exactly been wrong. 

“C’mere,” Dean said at last, and he yanked Castiel to him with the mistletoe still in hand. 

“You don’t have to humor me if you’re not interested,” Castiel said, his breath fogging in Dean’s face, though he still wouldn’t look at him. “I mean it.”

“But I mean it when I say that, yes, I’ll go out with you. I’ll even kiss you.”

A wide smile broke out on Castiel’s face. “You will?”

Dean met his eyes and nodded. “Yeah.” He leaned forward and pressed his lips to Castiel’s. They were warm and wet, apart from the sporadic chills that came from the melting snowflakes. 

They kissed for about a minute before Dean pulled back, his teeth chattering. “I’m freaking cold, dude. Can we continue this inside?”

Castiel laughed. “Of course, Dean. Let’s go back to the party.”

They strolled back into the building holding hands, and Dean glanced at the camera again, since cameramen had followed them outside to capture Castiel’s confession. 

“Hope this makes good TV,” he said as he held up their interlocking fingers. 

But he was smiling, because as crazy as Roman Enterprises was, a lot of good had come from working there.

And maybe he’d look back on the footage someday and be happy that this part of his life was filmed, so he could watch himself and Castiel fall in love, over and over again. 

**Author's Note:**

> Funny story! The poop pillow actually happened at the Yankee Swap my mom had at her work this year, and seeing as Castiel has an obsession with emojis, it was just too perfect! 
> 
> It was difficult keeping track of all the characters, but I hope I gave them all enough moments for you to guess who they were supposed to be! My friends Ila and Alena helped me figure them out, so many thanks to them! Here's the full list if you're interested:
> 
> Dean → Jim  
> Cas → Pam  
> Sam → Dwight  
> Garth → Michael Scott  
> Bobby → Stanley  
> Ellen → Phyllis  
> Meg → Meredith  
> Crowley → Creed  
> Ruby → Angela  
> Ash → Kevin  
> Chuck → Ryan  
> Charlie → Oscar  
> Marv → Toby  
> Becky → Ke1ly


End file.
